Andy Borowitz

John Oliver tells us all about the "Thurmond Rule" -- andshows us Miss Mitch calling it "this rule that doesn't exist""If the President has trouble doing nothing, we will be more than happy to show him how it is done."-- Senate Majority Leader "Miss Mitch" McConnell, asquoted this morning by the

-by NoahFor those who don’t know, because history just isn’t really taught in schools anymore, Tokyo Rose was the name of one or more female broadcasters operating out of Tokyo during WW2. Tokyo Rose broadcast pro-Japanese propaganda to U.S. troops in the Pacific war, bent on demoralizing them, paralyzing them with fear, or, worse, trying to get them to either desert or come over to the other side if they could. Every war has had variations of such things.Unlike Tokyo Rose, Herr Trumpf is much more successful.

- by NoahOh how I wish one could make Republican World vanish just by no longer writing about it. But, it persists like a horrible virus, bent on running its course while infecting the body politic with vile fevers and chills, and America ponders those “Did this come from my body” moments. Do we survive the ill effects of Republican World, or, do we succumb?

*Chuanpu = Trump, "as he is known in Mandarin," according to The New Yorker's Evan Osnos in a Sept.

Oh no, say it ain't so, Scott W!

Sorry, Dr. Ben, you're un-American, and it's time for you to STFU.by KenI'm sure you remember the kid who made the clock that nearly got him shipped to Guantanamo. A swell post the other day from BSSanders at Daily Kos:

With post-hearing update -- see below (Plus an update to the update)by KenTo the best of my knowledge I have never attended a public hearing of a NYC community board before tonight -- or maybe even a public hearing of any governmental agency.

Plus: I advance my latest theory as to why allthese Republicans are "running for president""[Jon] Stewart leaves behind a legacy of having raised the bar for political discourse — to jostle folks as they laugh at political folly, to remind people of the real-world consequences embedded in those punchlines, to demand that, amidst all late-night shucking-and-jiving, people in power should be held accountable for the state of our nation."-- Rolling Stone's Matthew Love, in "How J

by KenAt the top of the Redacted Tonight clip above, the great Lee Camp says:

"To those who thought Donald Trump was the only sociopath in the race, let me say this: not anymore."-- Wisconsin Gov. Scott Walker, quotedby The Borowitz Report (see below)Another long-awaited candidate for the 2016 GOP presidental nomination is finally here.