Garden variety GOP racist Ted Cruz couldn't even make it into the Top 10December-- time for Rolling Stone to make lists of the 50 greatest albums, 50 coolest videos and 50 greatest drummers, right. Sure… and the 50 dumbest things right-wingers said in 2013. Tim Dickinson put the list together, although there are weeks left for some of these crackpots to say even dumber stuff. Some of the DWT faves on his list:At number 50, the Republican who conspired with the domestic terrorists who blew up the Oklahoma City Federal Building, Steve Stockman (R-TX), a supposedly-recovered drug addict: "The best thing about the Earth is if you poke holes in it oil and gas come out." Of course, Stockman was hardly the only Republicano from Tejas who made the list. Oily Joe Barton also had drilling on his mind when he testified at a committee hearing that "The Great Flood is an example of climate change. And that certainly wasn't because mankind overdeveloped hydrocarbon energy." And then there was Stockman's closest, and funniest, neighbor Louie Gohmert who-- as he often does- -had racism on his little tiny mind: "We know Al Qaeda has camps on the Mexican border. We have people that are trained to act Hispanic when they are radical Islamists." And Stockman also came in with the 35th dumbest comment of the year attacking President Obama's push for gun control after the massacre at Newtown: "He's even using children. It reminds me of Saddam Hussein when he used kids." Not too be outdone, neighbor Louie G comes in with the 28th stupidest thing anyone said thus year (this one on his opposition to marriage equality): "When you say it's not a man and a woman anymore, then why not have three men and one woman, or four women and one man, or why not somebody has a love for an animal?" Pete Sessions came in at #16 giving his sage advice to his colleagues on the solitary purpose of the GOP's House majority and not knowing someone would rat him out to the press: "Everything we do in this body should be about messaging to win back the Senate. That's it." One better was the state's junior senator Ted Cruz: "We need 100 more like Jesse Helms in the U.S. Senate." And, obviously it wasn't just the Texas congressmen who made asses of themselves. Speaking to a crowd in Louisiana, Texas Governor Rick Perry-- probably still on drugs, said "There are many other states that embrace those conservative values, the approach that we've taken over the years. I'm in one today, in Florida."And now for the Top 10:
• 10- "We're not preaching austerity."- Wisconsin Rep. Paul Ryan, whose budget would slash $4.6 trillion in federal spending• 9- "For every one who's a valedictorian, there's another 100 out there who weigh 130 pounds and they've got calves the size of cantaloupes because they're hauling 75 pounds of marijuana across the desert."- Iowa Rep. Steve King on immigration and why he opposes the DREAM Act• 8- "We're not going to be disrespected. We have to get something out of this. And I don't know what that even is."- Indiana Rep. Marlin Stutzman on the aims of the GOP's government shutdown• 7- "We've done our work."- House Speaker John Boehner defending the track record of the least productive Congress in modern history• 6- "I don't think there's any Bush baggage at all."- 2016 contender Jeb Bush on the political consequences of the family name• 5- "Society itself is at risk and cannot continue."- Michigan Rep. Tim Walberg on the apocalyptic consequences of the Supreme Court's gay marriage decisions• 4- "I think, personally, it would bring stability to the world markets."- Florida Rep. Ted Yoho on the hidden upside of forcing America into default• 3- "My father had a ranch. We used to hire 50 to 60 wetbacks to pick tomatoes."- Alaska Rep. Don Young, doing his turn to aid the GOP's Hispanic outreach• 2- "The middle class. Since when in America do we have classes? That's Marxism talk."- Former presidential contender Rick SantorumAnd the dumbest comment by any Republican in 2013, the likely GOP nominee to run against Harry Reid next time…• 1- "Yeah, I would." – Nevada assemblyman Jim Wheeler, when asked if he would vote to reinstate slavery if his constituents wanted it
Ever wonder how they're doing with that re-branding project they started the year off with? Republicans and minority outreach… always something amazing to behold and savor.