"Thousands" of ex-gays go missing: Maybe they just decided to go shopping instead?

by NoahApparently July was something called Ex-Gay Pride Month. So it was, this past week, that when American Family Radio's (straight families only, please) Sandy Rios spoke to Ex-Gay Pride Month's organizer, Christopher Doyle, they both felt confident in predicting that “thousands of ex-gays are descending on Washington” for a very special Ex-Gay Pride Movement press conference to be held at the so-called Supreme Court. Although there was no word as to whether or not so-called Justice Samuel Alito was to grace the ex-gays with his robed presence, we do know that fewer than 10 people who claim to be ex-gays showed up at this past Wednesday’s big happening.Perhaps they were busy praying with the Bachmanns after a special Doyle-planned Ex-Gay Pride Dinner Party, which was to feature speakers Michelle Bachmann (sans hubby, I guess) and the Heritage Foundation's Oh Great Leader Jim DeMint, had to be canceled due to what Doyle calls "anti-ex-gay extremism," or what normal people might call "lack of interest."Perhaps instead they all forlornly wandered into one of Washington's fine gay bars to hobnob and otherwise nob with Lindsey Graham. Who knows? What we can tell you is that the 10,000 ex-gays, or whatever, didn't show up.So, what if they gave an Ex-Gay Pride Day and no one came? On his "Voice of yhe Voiceless" website, in a message no doubt viewed by tens, Mr. Doyle (right), who views himself as the de facto leader of the "Ex-Gay Movement," declared the event a smashing success because, in spite of threats and massive oppression from extremist forces, blah, blah, blah... Doyle claims that he is just seeking worthy equal protection and freedom from harassment under the law for people such as himself, who self-identify as ex-gay. OK. We all should be treated fairly. But, don't you just love it when anti-gay people bitch that they are being oppressed and harassed? Ooooo, it's all about me, me, me. I'm the one that's been sooo abused. My psychosis! My paranoia!

July 31, 2013 was a great day for former homosexuals in America! While the turnout was humble, the enthusiasm among those who participated in Ex-Gay Pride was immeasurable. Anti-ex-gay extremists are gleeful that "less than ten people showed up"… actually, by my count, nine former homosexuals (including an ex-transgender) and a half-dozen more allies came out to lobby Congress and show support at the press conference in front of the Supreme Court.

Hmm. Humble. It couldn't have been the weather. The weather was fine. So who got the blame? It was those “un-American" LGBT rights advocates with their "homo-fascism and indoctrination in the media." Reminding me of the bellowing crazies who stand up on soapboxes in London's Hyde Park shaking their fists at the clouds, Mr. Doyle even managed to spit out that "ex-gays aren't given a fair shake" (I'm not touching that one with a ten-foot pole). Why would LGBT people go to such lengths to deflate the efforts of "thousands of ex-gays"? Why, because those ex-gay efforts would "undermine the whole effort of the homosexual lobby." Who knew? Well, now you know. Hard times for ex-gays. Let us pray. #